Stop Pulling People Out Of The River | It’s Time We Make Sure They Never Fall In | A Guide to Women’s Empowerment

In our daily lives, it’s all too easy to find ourselves constantly “pulling people out of the river,” as Desmond Tutu so wisely put it. We get caught up in the endless tasks, urgent crises, and pressing demands of the moment. But when it comes to women’s empowerment — especially for those of us nurturing families, leading communities, or simply trying to stay afloat—there comes a point where we need to go deeper. We must look upstream and ask ourselves why people are falling into the river in the first place.

The Endless Cycle of Putting Out Fires

For many women, life often feels like a series of never-ending emergencies. Whether it’s managing a household, juggling work, or supporting our loved ones through tough times, we are frequently in the role of the caretaker, the fixer, the one who steps in to save the day. We pull people out of the metaphorical river, patch them up, and send them on their way.

But what happens when we step back and realize that we’re not addressing the root causes? What if, instead of endlessly putting out fires, we paused and asked why these fires are starting in the first place?

Identifying the Source

Taking the time to “go upstream” in our lives and communities is not easy. It requires a shift in perspective and a willingness to confront uncomfortable truths. For women, this can mean asking tough questions:

• Why are we expected to bear the emotional labor of our families and communities?
• Why do so many of us struggle with feelings of inadequacy, guilt, or burnout?
• Why are systemic issues like gender inequality, economic disparity, and lack of access to healthcare so pervasive?

These are not questions with simple answers, but they are necessary for real change. By going upstream, we begin to see the broader forces at play—societal norms, cultural expectations, and structural inequalities—that push people into the river.

The Power of Collective Action

As women, we often feel the pressure to handle everything ourselves, but true women’s empowerment comes from recognizing that no one can tackle these issues alone. It requires collective action and solidarity to create lasting change. Whether it’s advocating for policy changes, supporting other women in our communities, or simply sharing our stories, we can unite to address the root causes.

Going upstream might involve challenging the status quo, speaking out against injustice, or demanding better for ourselves and others. It’s not easy, but it’s essential if we want to build a world where women’s empowerment allows women and their families to thrive, rather than being swept away by life’s constant challenges.

Changing the Narrative

The wisdom of Desmond Tutu’s words reminds us that true healing and progress come from understanding the cause, not just treating the symptoms. For women, this means acknowledging the pressures we face and taking steps to change the narrative.

Let’s teach our daughters and sons that it’s okay to ask for help and that they are not alone in their struggles. Let’s support one another in our efforts to go upstream, whether that means advocating for mental health resources, fighting for equal pay, or simply being there for a friend in need.

Women’s Empowerment Through Awareness

Going upstream is about empowerment. It’s about realizing that we have the power to change the conditions that lead to our challenges. It’s about taking control of our stories and our destinies, not just for ourselves but for future generations.

By finding out why we’re falling into the river and addressing those root causes, we can create a world where women are not just surviving, but thriving. It’s time to stop just pulling people out of the river. It’s time to go upstream and make sure they never fall in.

This journey isn’t just about fixing what’s broken—it’s about building something better from the start. And together, we can make that happen.